Judge Serge Tomé (BE)
10 Selections
Three Top Choices
First Choice:
167
Indian summer
intersecting circles
hawks
Carolyn Hall
California, United States
The strength of this haiku lies in its imagery. Here, L1 is an abstract
image, the name of a season so charged with images: 'Indian' and 'Summer'. The
freedom of wind is a very important entry point into our imaginations.
In my opinion, one of the main characteristics of haiku is its structure,
similar to an iceberg: a small visible part, and a immense, hidden mass of
images issuing from imaginary, collective and private imagery. All its power
resides in the selection of that very small, visible
part, which will cause our minds to open to the 'recall' of personal
imagery.
'Intersecting circles': a magical image evoking circles of magic, the sand mat
of the Amerindians. These circles are not disconnected. Something happens at
their voluntary intersections; something is born, something like light -- the
last sparkles of summer before autumn, that season of death. Death of light, but
also death of native nations. Nations of wind and freedom. I have an Amerindian
friend. She often talks to me about geese. She speaks in images--as does this
haiku.
This haiku also has a dynamic side. The circles are not motionless, but are
designed in the sky. In fact, a great part of the Amerindians' vision
of the world is based on the circle. The circle is a magic image in
itself. This dynamic aspect of the gesture intensifies the magic.
The grammatical structure is very simple: an enunciation. Nothing else. This
kind of writing finds its strength in the power of the images and in their
configuration. No action. It is a static haiku. Some haiku have an explicit
action expressed by a verb, or by two parts joined by an explicit link. The
strength of this one is in the static placement of two terms. Two images of one
unique context. Notice that I said 'two images'. L1 is, for me, an
image in itself. 'Indian Summer'... It is very effective as a hook for
recalling images in the imagination, especially those of us from Europe. L2 is a
detail seen within the greater image of L1. Line 2 reinforces L1 -- as
a detail for the whole. L1 installs the context. L2 is one of the several
images emerging of that context. The author chose here, a magical image with
very great opening-power. In my opinion, it is more a one-context haiku than a
one-image haiku. This is a good way to describe the static and timeless
life of Amerindian people. A very different way to see the world. More static,
more attentive to details -- like L2.
A haiku I will remember for a long time.
Second Choice:
54
underground
parking
no space
for the moon
Terry
Ann Carter
Ontario,
Canada
We have here a
structure that doesn't respect the short/long/short rhythm. Why should it be
important! I always give more attention to the quality and the power of the
images. They are very powerful here. This haiku is based on contrasts: between
light and darkness; between up and down; between sky and earth; between visible
and hidden; between finite and infinite; between small and immense; between
space and confined; between short-lived human
constructions and eternal universe.
More than the images, is the effect created by their configuration. It is the
action of haiku, its internal spirit. Configurations are the verbs of haiku;
images, their words. Here, the author primarily used contrasts because they are
more powerful, but the entire haiku also creates similarity between the moon and
a car, two simultaneous relationships.
In my opinion, haiku must be evaluated more on images and their configuration
more than in rhythmic structure. Here the traditional structure is the only
thing that is not regarded. The cut into three segments is correct and affords
an effect of surprise at the end. Moreover, this haiku gives an opening to our
imagination at the end. It has much humor : the moon who doesn't find a parking
space...fresh and childish humour. A too rare feature in Western haiku.
Third Choice:
328
twilight . . .
a boy brings down
his kite
K. Ramesh
Chennai, India
Always, the
image...Here, the author uses, perhaps consciously, symbolic and very powerful
relationships. He calls on archetypes that are the basis of our imaginations in
action. Archetypes are the tools of our unconscious, our instinctive perceptions
of the world. They condition our glances over the world. They are, with
relationships (contrasts, parallelisms, reinforcement, scale effect, etc.), the
other engine of haiku.
Here, the child brings down his kite for the night. Like the sun goes down on
the horizon. How is it possible not to see the comparison? The sunset...one of
the primal images of the unconscious, carrying death of day and fear of
night. It is the child who brings down the light of day. He is the god who, in
his play, organizes day and night, gives orders to light and darkness, to life
and death. He strikes his kite as if a half-mast flag. But in our minds, it is
the light that the boy holds at the end of his string. He does all this with a
simple gesture, a play. In my mind, he is the primal God. He acts frivolously,
and by play, easily, without wanting to, orders the forces of the cosmos.
A very nice structure with a great economy of syllables. As a French-speaking
person, I am always fascinated by the power of the concision of English,
allowing the maximum effect of syllables.
This haiku tells about nothing else than a ordinary moment of a day. But, one
cannot refrain from being fascinated by what it tells. This successful haiku is
thus humble, but full of power. He tells about a detail of everyday life, but
appeals to our imagination to further draw out what one could not place in such
a small space.
Fourth Choice:
393
grim suits
hurry
in the City.....suddenly
a blue sari
sprite
London, England
Fifth Choice:
127
spring morning
. . .
the position of the chairs
from last night's meeting
Michael
Fessler
Kanagawa-ken,
Japan
Sixth Choice:
303
the planets align . . .
at the bottom of a glass
lemon seeds
W.F.
Owen
California, United States
Seventh Choice:
182
Cryptomerias
receding in the mountain mist
I forget the shrine
Tim Hornyak
Tokyo, Japan
Eighth Choice:
232
a dark bruise
on a stranger's shoulder . . .
summer dusk
Peggy
Willis Lyles
Georgia, United States
Ninth Choice:
406
bus journey .
. .
an old lady knits her way
through miles of prairie
Maria Steyn
Johannesburg, South Africa
Tenth Choice:
181
A caterpillar
climbing Buddha's mossy face
mountain temple path
Tim Hornyak
Tokyo, Japan
Next
read Judge, Cor van den Heuvel's selections and comments
Read
more about the WHF2002 Akita
2002
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